Okay, lookie here, If I hear one more woman say that the size doesn’t matter, I think I will SCREAM!  Who are you kidding, ladies?  I don’t care what you say to his face, if he pulled out something that equates to the size of a vienna sausage, we don’t have much to talk about, let alone anything else!

Now honestly, does size really matter? This a question that has haunted men of all races for centuries. What’s makes it even more frustrating is that there’s no real answer. Often, the right size depends on preference and compatibility. I have talked with women that say they have had great sex with men that aren’t hung like pythons and they don’t mind small size.  On the other hand, I’ve talked with women who said they don’t deal with men above a certain size.

So what, exactly, constitutes a big penis?

According to WebMd.com, the average penis length ranges from 5.5 to 6.5 inches (erect), but it’s all a matter of perspective – to a guy with a 2-inch penis, 4-inches may sound huge. Likewise, there are guys who complain about a 6-inch penis and long for 8-inches.   Every man is unique in his own way, including his penis size. Some men are long and thin, while others are wide and short, and some lucky ones – according to some women (me included… {smile}) are both long and large.

Just like men, preference is the same for women.  I have met guys that get really sensitive when it comes to conversations about penis size.  I know for me, I prefer a man with, let’s just say, generous measurements, but that’s MY preference.  Case and point…some years ago, this guy had been chasing me for years.  He would talk about how much he liked me and wanted me all the time.  So, once I was between boyfriends, I decided to take him up on his offer.  He did all the right things, wined me and dined me; I was actually a little enamored.  Until, the big moment came (and I use big loosely); we were in the mix and he said he was about to “give it to me.”.  My excitement turned to anger when he pulled down his pants.  He looked like a newborn baby!  I simple told him the night was over and left.  Now, I know there are some of you out there that say that was a mean thing for me to do and I may have missed out on a nice guy, but again…my preference.  Besides, how successful would the relationship have been if neither one of us was happy with the sexual portions of it?

Now, there are guys out there that have “other” skills that make up for the deficiency downstairs, but is that really enough?  I polled a few women to see just what they thought about this issue:

Nina, 32, says, “I should at least be able to feel some kind of penetration. If I don’t then he’s way too small for me.  It would be a total waste of my time”

Shannon, 27, says, “Even though he wasn’t the largest partner I’ve had, we still had great sex. He was such a funny guy and he did romantic things for me. Size had nothing to do with how much pleasure I got from him.”

Debra, 42, says, “I’m sorry, but I need to feel what I’m getting.  It doesn’t matter to me what size he is as long as I feel every minute.  I’m a really sexual person, so it would be a huge part of the relationship.”

Now, I was a Passion Party Consultant for a short while and learned that extreme girth and length isn’t needed for us to get that shattering orgasm we all seek.  A woman’s vagina only has about 4 inches worth of nerve endings down near the opening.  So, anything that extends past that we aren’t really feeling.  That’s not to say we don’t still want the brother packing 8 inches of heaven!  It’s kind of like sitting at a table staring at a huge bowl of (insert you favorite flavor here) ice cream loaded with toppings, knowing that we probably won’t be able to eat the whole bowl, but it damn sure is fun to try!


Like I said before, it’s a matter of preference.  While some women, (including myself), enjoy a man that has a more substantial offering, there are women that truly don’t mind a man that has…ahem…a little less to offer.  My thing is…I should not be able to hold your penis with only my index finger and thumb (trust me, true statement).  I should not have to contort myself into strange and painful positions so he can reach (again, true statement)!  I want a man that is hung to next Tuesday!  Just like that bowl, of triple chocolate brownie ice cream, I may not be able to take it all, but like I said, it’ll be a hell of a time trying! ?

Vonda Howard

Vonda Howard is the author of four novels, including the widely popular, D-Cup Dives Series that features sexy, and confident plus sized women. She is also the Editor-In-Chief of Black Literature Magazine. She also enjoys appletinis, gummy bears, Chipotle and all things filled with glitter and sparkles.

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