Every January 1st is your chance to put the past year behind you and get your new year off to a new start. Instead of just focusing on what you can change about yourself in 2012, maybe it’s time you consider jumping back into the dating pool and let the New Year breath new possibilities into your love life.
1. Set an example. Gandhi said: “You must be the change you wish to see in the world.” This beautiful quote can also be equated to dating. If you realize who you are and what you want in someone else, then you must be the ideal partner you wish to meet. Like-minded people have a way of finding each other out there in the world.
2. Re-evaluate your body image and wardrobe. Have you always loved your legs but never worn many skirts? Perhaps you’ve yet to embrace the fact that you’re always the tallest one in the room, so you’ve never stopped slumping? It’s time to accept the things you either love or cannot change, and dress in a way that accentuates the unique physical parts that make you who you are.
3. Commit to a new healthy you. It’s a new year, so why can’t it be a new you? Lots of people make New Year’s resolutions that involve fitness and a new healthy lifestyle, and in doing so it leads to a happier mind and soul. Make a pact with yourself to eat better, workout and cut out any bad habits. Once you have these elements in check, then you’re ready to share yourself with someone new.
4. Be realistic. It’s time to understand that perfection doesn’t exist and romance isn’t a nicely packaged Hollywood movie with an impossible ending. In having realistic goals in what you want in another person, you open yourself and your heart up to someone special automatically. However, once you do meet that person, the next thing you need to realize is even with great love and companionship comes the need to cultivate, dedicate and work hard at maintaining it.
5. Expand your interests. Not only do well-rounded people make for interesting dates and conversationalists, but they also make for better human beings. As January gets underway, consider taking a class in something that interests you or donating your time to a charity that is important to you. People love a person who’s selfless enough to engage in volunteer work.
6. Put the judgment aside. Whether you’re judging yourself or potential dates, you need to stop. Leave your old judgments in 2011 and give yourself and others a chance. Remember you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.
7. Make time in your life to smell the flowers. As human beings we spend our lives in a hurry and bustle. Too many of us don’t stop to smell the flowers or meet someone new, and yet we’re confused as to why we’re still alone. If you make time to enjoy the things you’ve been rushing past these last few years, you never know what you might find.
8. Don’t just think positive; be positive. Not only does being positive have a major impact on the health of your mind and body, but it’s contagious, too. People want to be around positive people because even on a gloomy day, a positive person is a glimmer of sunshine. Be that positive person and people will naturally gravitate toward you. No one likes a killjoy.
9. Love like you’ve never been hurt. No matter what 2011 gave you or took from you, don’t let it stand in the way of your future happiness. As we mentioned before this is a new year, so sweep any past disappointments and heartbreaks under the carpet, hold your head high and yes, love like you’ve never been hurt.
10. Get yourself out there! Maybe you’ve been afraid to make the jump into the uncharted waters of the dating world, but your match isn’t going to show up at your door while you sit around and wait. It’s up to you to make the first step and there’s no better time than a new year to do so. Our suggestion? Hire a matchmaker. You’ll get the emotional support and hands on attention that dating websites just can’t offer. And if you’ve been out of the dating scene for a while there’s no better way to find your future mate than by putting yourself in the hands of a professional.
Estelle Berrebi-Hurst, President
Vonda Howard is the author of four novels, including the widely popular, D-Cup Dives Series that features sexy, and confident plus sized women. She is also the Editor-In-Chief of Black Literature Magazine. She also enjoys appletinis, gummy bears, Chipotle and all things filled with glitter and sparkles.